Manifesting: Live the dream and not the fear!

For a very long time I created and recreated my fears, the things I did not believe I could have, yet desired, and lived a see-saw existence of having and not having because I misappropriated my faith. I backed the wrong horse. I believed in my fear and had no doubts about my fear becoming my reality and it did; bitching, moaning, and complaining with passion gave birth to lack in every area of my life. And when good things did happen [the exception and not the rule for my life] I did not trust that the good stuff would stay and it didn’t!

There are no coincidental occurrences. Nothing happens by chance. For every action there is an equal or greater reaction that will either enhance or diminish your life experience. Energy follows attention and will create that which you place your attention on. I placed my attention on my lack and/or fear of lack. I nurtured my beliefs 24/7 either with words or my thought life. You know the drill: Do what you have always done and you get what you’ve always got; and I did … Laughing out loud.

Flipping the script

Live your dreams and not your fears. Take the same measure of faith, energy, and passion you used to create the things you didn’t want, to create the things that you do want. Do you want to …

Create more income
Manage work related stress
Develop healthy relationships
Create a healthy body
Balance your emotions
Find mental clarity
Tap into your spirituality … and much more now!

Create with intent; make your desires your reality. The following process tells you how. All you need do is to become willing to do the work. Faith applied without work will not equal your vision. Direct your attention away from that which you do not want and place it on that which you desire. Participate in behaviors that support the creation of your identified goal(s) on the days you brush your teeth.

Strong emotions, a clear vision, specific steps, plus the consent to have, is how you create with or without intent.

Process: visualization with meditation

Create a visual image or symbol that represents what you want to create
Commit image to memory by focusing on it for 30 to 60 seconds
Place tongue on the roof of your mouth with the tip behind your front teeth
Find your comfortable seated position,
Relax your shoulders
Elongate neck by dropping head forward/lowering chin
You can place hands in prayer position at your heart or place them on your thighs with your palms up or down.
Close your eyes lifting your gaze to the third eye position and recall your image or symbol, see that picture in your mind’s eye.
Sit with the image that represents what you want to create for 20 minutes inhaling and exhaling through your nose
Repeat this process in the morning before you start your day and at bedtime; this should be the last thing you envision before you retire. Think of this practice as an adult bedtime movie/video written and produced for you by you!

Note: If your mind should wonder, don’t judge this event, simply note where you went, to the past or to the future, and then bring your gaze back to center (third eye) and resume nurturing your visual!


Loss, grief, and accepting change to heal and move on

We grieve over all losses whether we are aware of it or not. Any change in circumstances can initiate this process. Why? Because with each loss we feel something has been taken away from us internally. A void develops where that attachment has been ripped away. It is an emotional tear that makes us desperate to recover it and sad when we can’t. We feel diminished somehow by no longer having that person, place, or thing in our lives.

I looked everywhere I thought I may have placed it. I was desperate to find it. “What could I have done with that ankle bracelet,” I asked myself half expecting to hear me say, “You put the ankle-let in the top drawer of the nightstand next to your bed.” This wasn’t like me. I don’t throw things away … so, where was my ankle bracelet?

Grief happens when things change or when we lose something or someone who we care about. It matters not whether the object of our affection is animate or inanimate, we grieve over that loss. Be it a dollar or a dime, change in our situations and/or circumstances, a dismantled relationship or the loss we experience when a loved one transitions from this world to the next, the grieving process will be the same.

This process is called the 5 Stages of Grief, acknowledged by Elizabeth Kubler-Ross in her book On Death and Dying or the 5 phases of Managing Change, like the loss of my favorite ankle bracelet.


      1) Denial: What’s the first thing you do? You try to find the lost object. You tear up the place to locate the comb, the brush, or the penny that rolled under the sofa. In my case, it was the ankle.
      2) Anger: “Where did I put the dang gone thing? I should have taken it off before I went for that run, dang it!”
      3) Bargaining:“Please God, just let it be somewhere in the house. I promise I’ll never wear it outside again.” Yeah right!
      4) Depression: “O-mi-god, what am I going to do now? Oh man, my ankle looks naked.”
      5) Acceptance “Enough,” I said. “Get over this and move on. You can’t change what happened.” I had accepted the reality of my loss, experienced the pain, adjusted to my ankle without the bracelet, and reinvested in a new one.

We don’t have to go through the five stages in sequence. But we must go through them to heal and become whole again.

A story of moving beyond stuck

We are not defined by who we are, but by who we are becoming

Everything that has personal, professional, and spiritual meaning for me today began with a choice to do something different. Albuquerque, New Mexico was my Turning Point…

Up until that time, one of my favorite quotes used to be: “When you are stuck, throw a hand grenade, close your eyes, and JUMP!” Why was this one of my favorite quotes? Because I felt as if that was the only way I could move when I was stuck with no perceivable way out. You could say it was a “leap of faith,” but it wasn’t. It was more like a stab in the dark and my way of “busting loose.” However, that approach was not the best way to handle what I thought were insurmountable circumstances. When I jumped with my eyes closed I never knew where I would land. I often found that I had exchanged the skillet for the frying pan.

My dream job as a Hospice Nurse turned into a not so beautiful nightmare when downsizing reordered my life and I found myself without a job and receiving unemployment … When I received the notice from the state informing me that my benefits were nearly depleted, reality hit me like a brick. I had to get a job — and with a quickness. I was back to being placed through home health agencies, something I had done earlier in my nursing career. “Oh boy”, I sighed. I remembered why I traded the hospital setting for home health — too much drama! I had now traded the skillet for the frying pan. And I’m looking at a request from the city to vacate the premises. Where is that hand grenade? Life sucked.

There are times in life when you need something to help you navigate through and around rough waters until you are able to float your own boat, like how I dealt with the dismantling of a dream and my identity. I had defined myself by what I had become: a Hospice Nurse. I had attached my personal power to a position. And I did not know if I could be anything else. I felt powerless.

I needed to do something different. However, knowing that I needed to do something different was not enough; I had to want to do something different. I had to become sick and tired of being “sick and tired.” I had to become teachable. I had to stop running away from myself; and run towards ME. So, in July of 1993, I relocated to Albuquerque, New Mexico with my family, and I moved from Hospice Nurse to Life Coach.

Truth: We will not live up to our potential until we give ourselves permission to move beyond the words; to live boldly and to take measured risks.

Here are some pointers I have personally found helpful in motivating myself:

Take Charge of your Destiny

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